Crazy Undeserved Grace

Ever done something and replayed it over and over in your head?  Regrets, take-backs, wishing for a time machine all soon haunt your mind.  Ever watched something happen that you didn’t take part in, yet find yourselves grieved, heavy hearted, suffering from a pit in your stomach?

Well, I am sitting with a pit in my stomach and have fought tears every-time I have thought about this situation…

Awe, social media, the place were so many people love it because they can blast their feelings and commit to them 100%, but can safely hit the delete button if they soon find themselves regretting their words.

I love social media, I believe that it is a powerful tool, my views have changed, I have picked up causes and decided to act on them, connect with friends and yes get to share my blog.  But it is something that can be a tool that creates grief, fights, incessant comparison, shame and anger.  Those latter things I try to avoid and never want to be a part of.

A little over a year ago, my husband and I decided to get a joint account.  There were multiple reasons.  I stick to it, it was a great decision for us.  Rarely do I run into second thinking the choice we made.  When I have to scroll through his trapping sites and  see dead animals that might be the moment I have second thoughts.

Then yesterday happened.

Please as you read this, know without a doubt that I believe, support and stand by my husband.  He is the leader of our household. I look to him when difficult decisions have to be made, I submit to him.  I am blessed that he is who my son is growing up to be like, who my daughters will judge character or men against.  His views 80ish% of the time match mine.  We I guess deliver them in a different way.

A post was shared, I had saw it earlier in the day, scrolled past it and knew I would neither like it or share it.  Why? because  it made me uncomfortable, it made me sad, it made everything that I am learning about restoration and redemption seem impossible.  Little did I know that I was going to find that post shared from my timeline…yay joint account, love you hubby

The “oh crap!” heart race followed with “no!” soon flooded my heart

Do I agree with the intent of the post? Yes.  But I have found over time that I haven’t had to stand on my soap box to be heard.  That people as they spend time around me personally, read my blog, read posts or watch me from afar, already have a good idea on where I stand on issues that are controversial in our society.  “in the same way let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly father” Matthew 5:16.  I have been described religious, churchy, bible thumping and one with high morals.  Eh, I can live with those thank you very much.  My point is that I don’t have to stand on the mountains and shout out my opinions, because the majority of you know deep down, you have an idea of my views, because I do try and live my life in surrender to my Heavenly father.

The post was made, I won’t share it here, because it in all honesty grieves my heart. I don’t know how we as Christians are suppose to respond to it.

Do we error on the side of “natural” or “science”

Do we error on the side of “love the sinner NOT the sin”

I don’t know.  All that I am for sure certain of is that when I am wrapped up in sin, the last thing that will turn me running to Christ is a shaking finger at me.  Instead it is the gentleness of the holy spirit speaking, leading, correcting me as I see that God is disciplining me because he loves me as his child. “My child, don’t make light of the Lord’s discipline, and don’t give up when he corrects you.  For the Lord disciplines those WHO HE LOVES and he punishes each one he accepts as HIS CHILD” Hebrews 12:6

In this day and age we see bumper signs that say “COEXIST” with symbols representing all religious organizations.  We are told that we are to be tolerant, accept everyone regardless if their views are different then ours.

Christians feel “persecuted”,  believe that we have a taste of what the persecuted Christians faced after Jesus Christ made his accession to his heavenly home.  You know something?  We have NO clue what persecution is here in the US.  Do we get grouped into the crazy Westborough Baptist Church that spews hate? yes, sometimes.  Do we get lumped with adulterous lying Christian figures that fall flat on their face after their secret is let out of the bag, leaving their famous massive family in the cross hairs.  Yes, sometimes.  Do we fear for our lives daily, running from town to town for our beliefs? No.

I will say that it is a delicate time in society for us Christians.  We, if we are living lives dedicated to “going into the world and preaching the Good News” then we desire to share this amazing thing we ourselves have experience: crazy, undeserved Grace

My heart as a mommy wants to weep when I hear the argument of “natural”.  Why?  Because for some crazy reason, I waited while I grew a child that came through a natural process and was born with a genetic disease.  Her conception, birth, disease and life are all “natural”.  Yet I could tell you that the thing she wishes more then anything, is that God hadn’t made her with CF.  She recently told me that she can’t wait to go to heaven, so she doesn’t have to do  her vest or take meds anymore.  What 5 yr old child longs for heaven?  She is carrying something she wishes she didn’t have.

Natural is a defense that I struggle with.

I have friends and know people who are living the lifestyle this post was opposing.  I actually know someone who lived the lifestyle for many years and after finding the TRUTH realized they couldn’t any longer.  They wished they were never born with the desire to live in their past lifestyle.  Where they miraculously healed from their life of sin? No, but they have and still surrender and ask God to help them when they feel the old sin rising up trying  to shackle them. 

To my fellow Christians out there.  Can I ask you to do something with me?  Will you start stepping back and thinking about the woman in John 8:7?  Will you fight the urge to promote our Christlike views to a level of self-righteousness? God wants us to be his ambassadors (2 corinthians 5:20).  Are we being asked to quiet our views and accept and promote the worlds? Yes.  The world gets to declare their views and we are to accept them, but they refuse to accept ours. Is it right? No.  Yet I believe God is still going to get his glory.  I believe as more of us get to a point of seeing sin and not allowing our self-righteousness to win, but instead see sin and our hearts are literally broken for the sinner, THAT is when a revival, a movement of our faith will sweep across the nation.  Isn’t that what we want?  Don’t we want to witness the day when “every knee shall bow and every tongue confess He is Lord”?  It can only happen if we ask God to show us how to love the sinner without elevating ourselves.

I am not perfect, I don’t know how to love the sinner.  But the few times that God has placed someone wrapped in sin at my door, through the power of God’s grace he has given me his Spirit to reach the person.  I don’t have the answers to this topic, I don’t know the proved and tried way, I only know that God will show me and you how to bridge it.

To my friends, acquittances or strangers that were offended by this post.  I am sorry.  I am sorry that my views and my husband’s views evoke those feelings within you.  I can’t and won’t change my views, it’s a conviction deep within my soul.  Yes, my husband and I both share this view, but if I had had the chance to sit with you, share it personally, with my bible, with my transparency I would have.  I would have told you my redemption story.  I know that if you were offended, that there probably is little to say to you to make it better, since we will most likely disagree.  Will I give up hope that you might see why God says this is a sin? No.  But I can promise I won’t sling the sin at you.

At the end of the day, my heart is heavy as a momma, who sees her child living a life she didn’t get to choose.  Yes, there is a mom out there wondering why their child is living this life.  There are family members who love their child, sister, brother, ex husband or wife wrapped up in this lifestyle.  My heart is heavy for the modern day Christian who loves the Lord God with all their heart but feels as though everything that matters in our lives is put on trial and has to be stepped on so that other’s world views can be elevated, remember John 15:18-20.  My heart is heavy for the person who is living this lifestyle, that saw the words that pierced their hearts and brought anger or shame.  To you, the person that got offended will you please know that what was shared is something that I support, but wish that it was said differently.  But that is only because I try and live my life using the Word of God.  BTW that very book has labeled me a sinner too.  I have lied, cheated, gossiped, judged, not kept the sabbath holy, had other gods before him, caused dissension, had unwholesome thoughts and promoted myself to a place of elevation.

You know how I wake up everyday?  Thankful that his mercies are new, that his grace is sufficient for me and that I am a child of God.  I wake up knowing that my Redeemer lives.  I wake up knowing that the shackles of sin are broken because I have a victor fighting to keep me spotless until the day I stand and meet him face to face.  Guess what, he is your victor too.

“He has enabled us to be ministers of his new covenant.  This is a covenant not of written laws, but of the Spirit.   The old written covenant ends in death; but under the new covenant, the Spirit gives life” 2 Corinthians 3:6

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