I just recently ran into someone pregnant, we briefly chatted about how we were feeling and before I knew it I was mirroring her sentiments on carrying a growing life…you know…
“ugh, I’m SO over being fat”
“I am not one of those women who LOVE being pregnant”
“I’m SO ready to be done with it”
I walked away sad, frustrated, and totally upset with myself. Why did I let my mouth build up those statements and at one point agree with them?
I recently saw a video on facebook that brought me to tears, you know pregnancy tears. It was sweet, endearing, and everything my heart needed to respond to in order to look at these last 2 months, yes, LAST TWO months, and appreciate the gift God has for some reason given me again.
Time is flying, I many times don’t feel pregnant until nap time when I myself am screaming for my down comforter and a chance to reboot. Sure I have had some annoying pregnancy symptoms, been chewed out for my massive weight gain 3x at my OB apts and also had a very scary reaction to my 3 hr glucose test, but really, IF I had to be truthfully honest, then I need to admit, this time around, thanks to God’s plan, I’m feeling amazing.
Challenge me please, ask me how I am doing when you see me, with an all knowing smile that tells me that you are trying to help me focus and see the gift that is growing inside of me is just that a gift.
Since that dreaded day when I fell into my incessant need to be relational and not let the other person feel alone, I have since been stopping and trying to see the beauty of pregnancy, which has resulted in this letter that I wish someone would write to me, now, in my last 2 months of experiencing my body do something that many dream of.
Dear Pregnant mommy,
I see you, I know you, I can hear your heart seeping out with that look in your eyes as you waddle by the group of women burning calories in the zumba class.
YOU feel alone, YOU feel fat, YOU wonder “will I ever look like I did before my feet decided to swell so big that I needed to buy new shoes, but not cute shoes, practical shoes, because my feet can’t handle anything less”
That baggy sweater that you hope masks your growing body is your comfort, most likely from your husband’s closet, or worse bought when you snuck into the section of clothing that resembles the glaring TRUTH that nasty little scale decides to share with you. You have decided that you and the scale are no longer on speaking terms.
YOU are beautiful! Really you are. Your hair is shiny and growing thick and luscious. Your nails no longer chip when you finally win the battle and get that stubborn sippy cup to give up its lid. Your face glows, yes, it might be a little fuller, but really it glows, so much that strangers will tell you this, if you just would put listening ears on!
Those stretch marks that make you want to burn EVERY single piece of lingerie or swimsuit, literally bring you to tears. I know, crazy right, you had NO idea what a sacrifice it would be to give up your body for someone else!
But did you know that those stretch marks across your belly show that you have done the first step in being a mommy, you have decided to sacrifice, to eat and listen to your body and make sure you are helping your little one grow! Don’t listen to the “skinny you” version that tells you to walk away from that slice of cake or screams at you when you decide to have your 4th snack of the day!
Did you know those stretch marks along your thighs are there to remind you of the time when that little life will finally enter the world and how much work you did to push that sweet baby out. You WILL one day look at those stretch marks on your hips and smile as you look at your child that is no longer a baby and in someways wish you could go back in time.
Slow down mommy, don’t spend your days wishing and hoping that your little one would hurry up. Really, SLOW DOWN. Grab a piece of candy, go lay down and watch the gymnastics take place. Find a shirt or dress that makes you feel sexy and rock it and bask in the fact you DON’T have to suck your belly in right now!!!!! Snuggle up with a book or an older child if you have one and take a guilt free light snooze in the afternoon.
Most of all, don’t think about the negatives, don’t fall into the trap of this world that wants everything NOW. Don’t read about the newest celebrity that is back to pre-baby weight by 6 wks postpartum…I have a secret for you (she starved herself and had a personal trainer screaming at her calling her fat). Instead, thank God for entrusting you to grow a tiny human, thank your spouse for the extra work he has picked up since those two little lines changed your lives, thank your children for fighting and running to see who first will crawl on their hands and knees to find your slippers under the couch each morning, and thank that sweet little baby for making you let go of things that DON’T matter.
Hold tight pregnant mommy, live in the now, because before you know it, your baby will be here and you will actually MISS being pregnant!
Walk with your head held high, don’t worry about the fact your thighs rub together now, smile when you see others and just for a second realize they are smiling at you and the gift of life growing in your belly 🙂 Rub your belly and talk to your sweet little bean and tell them how much you love them and want them to grow big and strong and to not hurry up, that you have plenty of time to wait until it’s time to hold them in your arms. Most of all mommy, remember, you have a gift, one that many women long for, don’t allow yourself to think that what you are going through isnt a blessing!